The Power of Positive Thinking: How to Shift Your Mindset for a More Fulfilling Life
- chloejasmineliving
- Apr 19, 2023
- 8 min read
Hey Friends,
Chloe Jasmine here, and today I'm chatting about something we could all use more of in our lives: positive thinking. I know what you're thinking. "Positive thinking? That's so cheesy!" But hear me out. Positive thinking is a really powerful tool that can help you shift your mindset and create a more fulfilling life. It’s super easy to get caught up in negative thoughts, especially with everything going on in the world today, plus we’re all coming out of the “winter blues” and…
The.
Struggle.
Is.
REAL!
But trust me, shifting your mindset can lead to a more fulfilling life. What is positive thinking?
Positive thinking is a mental attitude that focuses on the good things in life, rather than the negative. It involves looking for the silver lining in every situation and believing that things will eventually work out for the best.
Positive Polly can get down too.
To be honest, I’ve always been a positive person – I was just born that way, or maybe I got it from my mom. Sometimes, to my own detriment (yes, there can be down sides too), and my early-life friends would tell you, I wore rose-colored glasses. If I’m speaking about myself, I’d say, I’m a cynical romanticist: I believe in the best in everyone and yet, I’m jaded AF. I give everyone the opportunity to show me their absolute worst before allowing negative thoughts to creep in. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to be or stay positive – trust me, it’s way easier to be negative and see the downside of everything. For me, when things start piling up consecutively, one thing after another, even the most positive spirit can break down. Quick recap of my past 8 years:
New job required me to move to a small town, where I knew no one in my early 30’s, I realized I had been in a relationship with a total psychopath who more than likely had dissociative disorder, broke up, then found out more crazy stuff about him from (shocker) other women all over the country – like, What the ACTUAL fuck ?!– there are really some creepy dudes out there. Anyway, then was totally lonely and freaked out to be alone, without any local friends and this psycho knowing exactly where I lived and that I had nobody around who would ever know if I went missing…speed up 3 months, I meet a guy who was super-hot and sexy and had all those uber bad boy mixed with manly-man attributes I think are so dreamy, plus he’s from NYC, and has a dirty old-school BK accent that I could listen to for hours. But I’m totally emotionally unavailable, negative about men in general, totally mentally and emotionally fucked by said ex-psycho. Eventually, we get married, have beautiful daughter, I almost lose beautiful daughter early in pregnancy, get put on intense bed-rest for 7 out of 9 months of pregnancy, get extra fat, plan an awesome wedding in Italy, which gets cancelled literally 80 days prior to the wedding day, no deposits or money spent was refunded, get put on steroids for an awful never ending sinus infection that then I have a horrible reaction to, gain 30 lbs. in 30 days, get steroid-induced Cushing’s disease, which totally crushes goals of being in shape… At 2 years old, my sweet baby girl is diagnosed with every possible sensory processing disorder, except for one. COVID happens. Oh, and NO doctors or therapists are seeing patients in this time, no evaluations available, and pretty much, the world is in need of far more pediatric cognitive therapists and occupational sensory therapists, neurologists, etc.… Aaaand, she may be having seizures in her sleep, but we can’t quite get a diagnosis, b/c every EEG shows activity spikes all over the brain, but not enough to pinpoint or diagnose seizure disorder/ Epilepsy for sure. Finally, I get her in with the right therapists and into the right schools – oh wait… Does insurance cover any of this? FUCK NO. In fact, I get to jump through 500 hoops every 90 days, just to be told “fuck you, no.” which is basically a full-time job. Husband stops working during COVID, because he’s in hospitality and well – you know the rest. So, we are down to one income, of which is just being pummeled by all the healthcare costs and rising inflation. Husband becomes deeply depressed, thinks really awful thoughts (I’ll let you fill in the blank there), and then my company lets everyone know they got hit post-covid with revenue pains and has to cut everyone’s pay by 60%. WHAT???? Husband goes back to work post-covid, switches careers to a new SaaS company, has great experience over a year and a half, then gets laid off because of two down months in sales, despite the fact that they tell him he is the most consistent and highest rate closer on the team and charismatic as fuck and basically holds the entire sales team together on the daily…I take a job I thought would be my dream job, turns out to be a total fuck show internally with toxic leadership and so I quit and search for something new that can carry me + 2, maybe 3…Oh, and did I mention, my mother-in-law literally hates me and has waged a 4 year war against me for “taking her son from her” ? AKA, we moved back to my home town ( a mere 134 miles from her), so in turn, because he is a rare, but only-child to an Italian immigrant mother – she has called me the devil and basically made sure everyone she knows, including her friends and family all think I’m a horrible human – no matter how much I have tried to make her a part of our lives (this could be its own series of laughable and terrifying short stories).
So, you can see, easily, how I may have been able to have some not-so-positive thoughts over the past several years. But what’s not in that series of unfortunate events, are the bright parts. And those bright parts are how I have been able to pull myself away from negativity. I’m not saying I didn’t get dragged down into it at times, I for sure did. I was insanely lonely after I had my baby. I had her later in life, and no one to really go through that with, not to mention COVID on the heels of it. But in the worst times, I pulled myself out by shifting my perspective. I started focusing on the good things in my life, and I started believing in myself and leaned deeply into my Faith. And you know what? It worked! My life started to change for the better. I was happier, more successful, and more fulfilled.
So, how do you shift your perspective and start thinking positively? First and foremost, it’s a PRACTICE and a JOURNEY – give yourself GRACE. One way is to practice gratitude. This is the one, for me, that is a ticket to shift, every time. Take a few moments each day to write down things you're thankful for, big or small. This helps shift your focus from what's going wrong to what's going right. Tip for your gratitude journal: Be specific. Don't just write down "I'm grateful for my family." Instead, write down something specific that you're grateful for. Remember, the universe listens, thoughts and words are energy – so be specific. Think about the things you want back and see where they show up, then write those down and give them the gratitude they deserve.
Another tip is to reframe negative thoughts or write positive affirmations.
Instead of saying "I can't do this," say "I'm still learning, but I'll get there." This helps you see challenges as opportunities for growth, rather than roadblocks. This is a big one that I probably talk to my husband about every day. I say, “Stop looking at everything at an obstacle or roadblock! See the path around it, if there’s a wall, that just means you must think of a new way.” I have stricken the phrase “I can’t…” from my household – it’s absolute trash and a lie that we tell ourselves b/c we are employing lazy thinking. Like my mom says, “Whether you CAN or CAN’T, you’re right.” Write down statements like "I am capable" or "I am successful", “I am worthy of (fill-in-your-blank)” and repeat them to yourself daily. This helps reprogram your brain to focus on the positive and is a great tool for manifestation.
And finally, surround yourself with positivity. Spend time with people who lift you up and engage in activities that bring you joy. Friends, family, co-workers, kids, animals, nature – whatever makes you energized and supports your soul song – spend time every day, there!
Positive Shift Tools & Recap:
Why is positive thinking important?
There are many reasons why positive thinking is important. Here are just a few:
It can improve your mental and physical health. Studies have shown that positive thinking can help to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. It can also boost your immune system and help you to recover from illness more quickly.
It can help you to achieve your goals. When you believe in yourself and your abilities, you're more likely to set and achieve your goals. Positive thinking can also help you to stay motivated and focused when things get tough.
It can make you happier. Positive thinking can help you to focus on the good things in life, which can lead to increased happiness and satisfaction.
How can I start thinking more positively?
If you want to start thinking more positively, here are tips recapped:
Start your day with gratitude: write, it, say it out loud, tell a friend, talk to God – whatever way you choose, start with gratitude.
Write and repeat positive affirmations to yourself. After I write mine, I record them on the voice recorder app on my iPhone and then play them on repeat to myself as I walk to the gym.
Do something nice for someone else. Helping others is a great way to boost your own happiness and fulfillment. It can also help you to take your mind off your own problems. For example, you could volunteer at a local soup kitchen or donate to a charity that you care about.
Spend time in nature. Nature has a way of calming our minds and spirits. So, get outside and enjoy the fresh air! For example, you could go for a walk in the park, hike in the woods, or just sit on your porch and listen to the birds sing.
Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment without judgment. It can help you to relax and to focus on the good things in your life.
Surround yourself with people and things that recharge you and lift you up. For the LOVE, turn off the news and social feeds! Remember, Media was created to drive bias and actions toward a bias; Social Media feeds are driven by algorithms that recognize patterns – you watch one negative video and soon enough, that’s all you see – don’t be a puppet. If you want to check in on a friend on IG – call them instead, have a coffee date or dinner together – you’ll get much more out of it, I promise. Listening to uplifting music or spending time with people who inspire you recharges your energy. The more positivity you have in your life, the easier it is to maintain a positive mindset.
Remember, positive thinking is a practice, not a destination. But with consistent effort, you can shift your mindset.
And finally, remember to give yourself grace. It's okay to have negative thoughts and feelings but try not to dwell on them. Instead, acknowledge them and then focus on something positive.
I know that it's not always easy to be positive, but it's worth it! When you focus on the good things in your life, you'll start to see more of them. And
when you believe in yourself, you'll be more likely to achieve your goals.
So don't give up! Keep your head up and keep moving forward. You can do this!
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